Try this simple equation-
X - Z = Unhappiness
Where X is "How I think things ought to be..."
And Z is "How things Are in this moment."
This idea has been with me for 20 years. I'm still working on the application. And discovering new aspects of it. Like any simple truth, it has subtle complexities.
For instance, it's rather obvious that if you're expecting the world to deliver you rose petals and sunshine every day, then a rather persistent state of disappointment will interfere with your Inner Peace. It's less obvious that a pessimistic outlook can also result in discomfort.
I remember one of the most blessed moments of my life, being in the woods in the innocent presence of a young fawn. Even there, with no requirements from the world, I found that there was a tiny disturbance in my heart. "This can't last. I shouldn't even be here. I'm too short on money for a vacation..." Etc.
So foolish, the estranged mind. And remarkably good at shell games.
Perhaps the goal is to come to terms with what is. Perhaps just to allow what is on the way to what is becoming. Perhaps the best road is to let go of the judgments. I don't actually know.
I do know that when the difference is small, I feel happier. When the distance is great, I suffer. So I practice faith and trust. And I try to celebrate little improvements.
Hopefully, in increasing increments of time, I can get to X = Z
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